Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Happy People

I'm reading David Niven's PH.D. The 100 Simple Secrets of Happy People. Not bad. So, number one...we are all here for a purpose. We are supposed to get good things done. There's a reason we were born and our lives make a difference. Guess I better get to it.

Saturday, October 15, 2011


I think the guys in the house should have to clean the toilet. Inside and out because girls rarely miss.

Thursday, October 13, 2011


Funky Models

I picked up a copy of Bazaar and I was so so happy I didn't want any of the high fashion clothes in there.I don't want the 2,350 dollar Jason Wu purse of the $195 dollar pair of orange pants from DKNY. I don't want tolike the women in the Calvin Klein ad because they scare me had have lips the size of Vermont. Then there's an outfit by Stella McCartney that looks so freakin silly, it's a top with lapels so large the cover the models underwear, but she's not wearing any pants. It's so goofy I'm having a hard time describing it. I couldn't get a picture of it but here's another one of her's that I really don't want. The only woman I think I have anything in common with in the copy of Harper's is Ellen DeGeneres. That's saying something right there.

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Way Too Much Down Time

If you are at home doing this...Get A Job!

What Did I Say to My Kids?

The Way We Talk to our Children Becomes Their Inner Voice.
- Peggy O’Mara

That's such a huge thought.  What did I say to my kids this morning and last night? Is that still rolling around in their beautiful brains? I do know I yelled "I love you Monkey Butt" out the bathroom window as they were walking down to the bus. So I guess I'm ok.

Monday, October 10, 2011

A Guitar That Sounds Like Dolphins! DQ

DQThere are two things I love about Dairy Queen, first the commercials. they are really really funny. They blow bubbles with kittens in them. That's funny.  These commercials are so good, when they come on the tv everybody in the house starts yelling at each other so we can all watch.That hasn't happened since my grandmother fell in love with Sheriff Matt Dillon in Gun Smoke in 1968.  Here's the link to the one about the guitar that sounds like dolphins. second thing I love are the their mushroom Swiss burgers. Oh my Lord, they are so yummy. The smell is intoxicating and they taste better than any burger I've eaten in years.  When I get burgers I try not to eat the bun so I sit in DQ with a yummy slippery grilled hamburger covered in mushrooms and Swiss cheese. I might look disgusting but man am I happy.

Sunday, October 9, 2011

Get Him!

I just thought it was funny.

Get Him Mr. Cop

Oh my Lord, there's nothing better than driving on the interstate, a dude tailgates, then passes like an idiot. At 90 miles an hour. He glares at you as he swooshes past. And then you hear it, it the distance, the sound of the siren and you see the blue lights in your rearview mirror. The cop is coming up behind you like a tornado, and you know he's not coming for you. And as you pass the doof face and copper on the side of the road you wave and smile. JUSTICE

Monday, October 3, 2011

The Perfect Birthday Gift

I love knowing exactly what I'm going to get someone for their birthday.  Lexie turns 15 this Friday and there's not a doubt in my mind what I'm buying. And she's going to love the ____________________. When she opens the box/package she willl make all kinds of happy noises, she'll do the little happy dance, I love so much. Yeah, the ____________will fit, will be perfect, will be loved, unlike the Swivel Store that didn't fit in my cabinet this weekend. Because I know exactly what I'm getting her I don't have to wander through the Mall picking up weird shirts and hats and books she doesn't care about. I don't have to hold up odd looking jewelery and wonder if she will think it's cool. And I don't have to buy her a pet that might die in six month because she'll forget to feed it. (wait  minute, that wasn't Lexie, that was Mary who accidentally killed her pets. She gave them plenty of love but not enough water) Lexie is gonna love the ______________and I'm gonna be a hero.

Sunday, October 2, 2011

Stupid Swivel Store

I got the Swivel Store, spice rack thing, for my birthday. I was very excited.  I've been wanting it for months because I believed it would improve my life and my kitchen cabinets.  I loaded it up with all the spices I never use, curry, marjoram, allspice. Who uses that stuff?  But when I tried to put it in the didn't fit. It's too tall. That's sad but we also got a pull up bar for the doorway and it's awesome. Everyone told me if you hang a bar, you'll want to do chin ups.  It's true, everybody has spent the day trying to do them. I managed tow, jack did dozen, Lexie almost got one and Sandor and his little buddies tried for hours to do a few. They pulled and pulled until their skinny little arms were shaking.  So, no luck for the spices but say yes to the chin up bar. Get you some guns!